I don't want to help the poor!

     This quote has really made me think.  The problem is that I don't like the conclusions I come to when I think about it.  I know the first possibility can't be true.  There is no way that Jesus was as selfish as I am. So according to this quote I only have one other possibility.  That I really don't want to help the poor!
     Now here is where I will totally contradict myself, in actuality I really do want to love the poor and serve the needy.  I just don't like the last part "without condition."  I have all kinds of conditions to my loving the poor and serving the needy.  First, my help has to make sense to me and be on my terms.  Second, the poor and needy must show their gratitude for my help.  Third, the help must result in some tangible life change from the afore mentioned poor and needy.
     If you have read my past blogs you may have heard me talk about "Alex."  Alex is a man who occasionally stands on the side of the road with a cardboard sign begging for help because he is "homeless."  I have tried multiple times to help Alex.  I have talked with him, prayed with him, gave him food, hot coffee, and clothing.  I have offered to help him get a hot shower and anything else I could think of that would help him.  Each time I helped it met my first two qualifications but sadly not the last.  My acts of kindness made sense to me, were on my terms, and Alex was very grateful.  Unfortunately, they have not resulted in any tangible life change.
     Because of this last condition of mine not being met, I have found my heart becoming hard towards Alex.  Recently, I have noticed him standing by the road on crutches.  The more cynical side of me wondered if they were just a prop.  The other day my wife and I were riding our bikes on the bike trail when I was passed by Alex riding his bicycle with his crutches strapped to the bike.  Because of this, I felt completely justified in the fact that I was no longer reaching out to Alex.
     Jesus tells a story of two different groups of people standing before him on judgement day.  To one group he says that they will be punished because they didn't take the time to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, visit those in prison, and care for the sick.  To another group he says that they will be rewarded because they did the exact opposite.  He concludes his story with this chilling statement: "I tell you the truth, when you did it to the least of these my brothers and sisters, you did it to me."
     That sounds exactly like what we stated at the beginning, "loving the poor and serving the needy without condition."  I continue to wrestle with what this will look like in my life, but I refuse to become content in hiding behind my mask of comfortable American Christianity.  I determined long ago that I was going to be a follower of Jesus Christ, and he doesn't seem to give me any options on this issue.  He says pretty clearly what a follower looks like.  It doesn't appear to me that my "service with conditions" is going to cut it.
     Even though I don't like what I see when I take a honest look at my self, by God's grace this isn't where I am going to stay!